The Best Man
by Vani Jane
Summary: Roderich and Elizabeta were getting married and they've both agreed to have the awesome Gilbert Beilschmidt as the best man. FRYING PANGLE


**Author's Note: **The fourth out of ten fics I've mass-uploaded. Lol.I was bored and went to TFLN to entertain myself. I come back bearing Hetalia one-shots for fans to read. This TFLN-inspired fanfiction is my first Frying Pangle and one where Hungary's a girl. Lol. **Please don't forget to review! No flames but critique's are welcomed!**

**Pairing(s): **PrussiaxHungaryxAustria / GilbertxElizabetaxRoderich; (_Hints of_) SpainxRomano / AntonioxLovino; FrancexCanada / FrancisxMatthew; GermanyxItaly / LudwigxFeliciano

**Genre(s): **Humour

**Warning(s): **Crack, Sexual Themes, Shounen-Ai, Human Names

**Disclaimer: **This is a work of fiction by a fan for fans. This has no relation to the real countries and its people. Hetalia Axis Powers rightfully belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya.

"**The Best Man"**

Gilbert Beilschmidt stared at the confounding card. For the love of his awesomeness, it had frills! Who, in their right mind, would send a frilly card asking his awesomeness to be the best man for their wedding? They could have just text messaged him to save the trouble!

Oh, right, he almost forgot... this was Roderich Edelstein he was dealing with. The anal-man of all anal-men, in more ways than you think.

Roderich had been Gilbert's best friend since freshman year of high school. They didn't start out as friends since they had nothing in common during that time. Though, after a series of events, the two became the best of friends. There was nothing that could separate them throughout high school that it had every body thinking that they were humping like bunnies together but no one had any proof to verify that bit of gossip and both parties were tight lipped about it.

When college came, Roderich went to some top-notch music academy and Gilbert went to a military academy. That was then they had parted ways and Gilbert had made interesting friends during those years they were apart. There was the Spaniard, Tonio, who loved tomatoes and children; the French, Francis, who loved wine and anything or anyone beautiful (and getting naked with them) and there was the Italian, Lovi, who was Tonio's 'tomato'.

And it was also then that Gilbert had first met Roderich's long-term fiancée, Elizabeta Héderváry. She was everything that Roderich wasn't in fact, one could say she was more like Gilbert than Roderich. She looked like she ran around Roderich's circle of peers but she was always running around with Gilbert or wrestling on the mud. He and Elizabeta were just as close as he had been with Roderich.

Although, the group, most commonly known as the Bad Friends, were eventually kicked out of school for various reasons. Tonio stared a quaint little café with Lovi, who had inherited a Mafia from his grandfather; Francis went back to France but frequently made long-term travels to Canada; Elizabeta was sent to finishing school and Gilbert continued on being awesome.

"Bruder, you have been staring at that paper for five hours now." Ludwig, Gilbert's younger brother who was home for a few weeks, pointed out. "The wurst is nearly done."

"Ah, there are just some things that even someone as awesome as I ponder about." Gilbert sighed, finally putting down the card.

"Eh?" Ludwig blinked, shocked at his brother's reply. "What happened to you?"

"It's nothing really," Gilbert said but frowned a minute later.

"Has this got anything to do with Roderich and Elizabeta's wedding?" Ludwig asked after some time.

When Gilbird chirped instead of Gilbert replying, Ludwig took that a definite yes.

"Oh, bruder, I'm sure Roderich or Elizabeta would understand." Ludwig said, trying to comfort his brother's distress. "We all know how you hate stuffy events like those – but think about it, it will be a good opportunity to show off that new suit you bought from Italy yesterday."

"Of course it would!" Gilbert grinned at his brother, "But that's not it, bruder."

"It's not?"

"No, it's not."

"Then... what is it?"

"I mean, I am happy for Rod and Beta but..."

"But what?"

"Remember the rumours during high school?" Gilbert suddenly asked.

Ludwig slowly nodded, unsure where this was going. "... Ja... Feliciano used to talk about it a lot."

"Well..."

"Are you saying that it's true?" Ludwig gasped.

Gilbird's chirping was the answer.

"BRUDER!" Ludwig choked. This was a shocking revelation, he had never known his brother had been sleeping with Roderich. "What is the meaning of this?"

"It was a casual four-year relationship." Gilbert replied with his signature snicker. "Kesesesese~"

"Don't _kesesese _me right now, bruder!" Ludwig slammed a hand on the table. "What would Beta say when she finds out the best man slept with her husband?"

Gilbert shrugged, "I don't know but I hope she won't hit me with her frying pan."

"I'm sure she would and more!"

"But I'm more worried what Roddie would say if he finds out I used to sleep with Beta." Gilbert frowned.

"What?"

"We did more than just wrestling on the mud."

"..."

"Tell me, west, do you think it will be awkward to be the best man for the wedding after I've slept with both the bride and groom?"

"... … ..."

**The End**

**Author's Note: **I love TFLN! It's like the explicit version of seventhsanctum. LOL. The message from TFLN was:

_(250): View more from British Columbia_

_Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?_

**Prussia: READER! YES, YOU! Click that review button and send awesome me your answers!**

**Me: **Seriously, though, don't forget to leave a review – with an answer for awesome Prussia or not. No flames, though. Gilbird doesn't want to turn into a fried chick. Gilbird eats critique's to make him a better mascot, so include those, too.


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